Turkey and Clarkson in top food cracker jokes

A joke about the face of food and drink delivery service Amazon Prime Jeremy Clarkson and mulled wine was included in a list of the best new Christmas cracker jokes, according to a poll from television channel UKTV Gold.

The joke, which was voted the third funniest new joke, is: Why were Jeremy Clarkson’s colleagues excited to try his mulled wine? Because they’d been floored by his punch.

The joke pokes fun at Clarkson, who quit the BBC earlier this year after allegedly punching a producer on the programme Top Gear.

Just ahead of Clarkson in the list of funniest new jokes, were puns about former Labour leader Ed Miliband and Amazon.

Ed Miliband

The top joke was: Why does Ed Miliband like advent calendars? He gets to open the door to number 10.

It was followed by: I told my Granddad to go to Amazon for his Christmas shopping. He phoned me two days later from Brazil.

Here we feature the best food and drink jokes from the poll, as well as a selection of some classic Christmas cracker jokes.

The fourth funniest new joke involved a traditional Christmas turkey and the latest film hit Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

It was: How does Darth Vader like his Christmas turkey? On the dark side.

Best new jokes and classics

See below for the best of the rest new food and drink Christmas cracker jokes.

  • Why is there no Champagne at the Chelsea Christmas party? Because Mourinho got rid of the Fizzy-o
  • Why was the turkey at the Talk Talk Christmas party such a mess? It was hacked
  • Why does Len Goodman insist on a selection box at Christmas? Because he enjoys a good Twirl
  • How do we know what Father Christmas has for dinner? He posts it on InSantagram

Unimpressed by the new breed of Christmas Day puns? Enjoy the below selection of classic Christmas cracker jokes, chosen by the FoodManufacture.co.uk editorial team.

  • What do you call a lobster who won’t share his presents? Shell-fish
  • How does good King Wenceslas like his pizza? Deep pan, crisp and even!
  • Who hides in the bakery at Christmas? A mince spy!
  • What did one snowman say to the other? Can you smell carrots?
  • What’s the most popular Christmas wine? ‘I don’t like Brussels sprouts!’
  • Who beats his chest and swings from Christmas cake to Christmas cake? Tarzipan!

So do you think you're funnier? Send us your best food and drink related Christmas cracker joke to win a mystery prize. Send your jokes in before January 7 2016 and we will publish the best ones.

Email your jokes to laurence.gibbons@wrbm.com.